


We Are Bound (You and I)

by Kajune



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Demons, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Lucifer/Sam Winchester, Forgiving Sam, Hell, Hurt Lucifer, Hurt/Comfort, Lucifer's Cage, M/M, Past Torture, Post-Episode: s05e22 Swan Song, Redemption, The Author Regrets Nothing, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-12
Updated: 2017-08-26
Packaged: 2018-12-01 09:52:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11483904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kajune/pseuds/Kajune
Summary: Sam knew he was the Devil, but at the same time, he couldn't bring himself to hate Lucifer fully. They were two halves made whole anyway.





	1. Chapter 1

"I've been waiting for you...for a long, long time. Come on, Sam. You have to admit -- you can feel it, right? _The exhilaration._ And you know why that is? Because we're two halves made whole. M.F.E.O. Literally."

Lucifer spoke with much enthusiasm, a clear contrast to the voice that responded.

"This feels pretty damn far from good."

It didn't discourage him.

"I'm inside your grapefruit, Sam. You can't lie to me. I see it all - how odd you always felt, how...out of place in that...family of yours. And why shouldn't you have? They were foster care - at best. I'm your real family."

Sam denied it again.

"No, that's not true."

"It is. And I know you know it. All those times you ran away, you weren't running from them. You were running towards me."

M.F.E.O.

At the time, Sam wanted to keep denying anything Lucifer had to say and tell him to shove it, but Lucifer was right. Sam couldn't lie to him. He **did** feel the exhilaration, but Sam could not let go of the fact that Lucifer winning meant people dying. Millions and millions of people. Sam didn't want to be a part of that, but knowing he could prevent it, he made the effort to resist. He pushed on with defiance, but at a personal cost.

Sam fell into the cage, dragging Lucifer, Michael and Adam along with him. The incident led to the revelation of a much darker side of Lucifer, who lashed out in fury and disbelief at being brought back to the last place he ever wanted to be. Sam was to blame, and Lucifer poured his rage onto the human through cuts and burns and rows of insults.

Sam suffered, and so did Michael and Adam. The former fought back on occasion, proving himself vicious as the lore books suggested, while the latter wept pitifully for his mother's embrace. Sam wept too, for the knowledge he would never go back home, but the sight of a ferocious archangel also brought out tears. Sam knew that as angry as Lucifer was at him, each attack was like a double-edged sword; Lucifer was hurting himself by unleashing his rage on his cell mates.

Whatever the lore books implied, Lucifer was not prone to hate, but the world had been unfair to him as it had been, and continued to be, towards Sam. Even as Lucifer tortured him, Sam couldn't help but feel sympathy for the one being who ever understood him. Down here, there was no one to protect, and thus no one to keep Sam from accepting that he did feel a connection to the archangel.

It took fifty years for Lucifer to accept his fate, to accept what Sam had done, and leave Sam be. Maybe he heard Sam apologize, maybe he simply didn't want to fight with Michael anymore, or maybe he was tired of hurting other people.

Pure silence filled the cage afterwards, but the quiet was no better than the constant screaming. Sam hated it, he hated having to sit and miss Dean and Bobby and accept over and over that he could no longer see them. The cage was driving him mad with guilt, and he noticed everyone else was affected by thoughts in their heads.

It was as if the cage was designed to mentally disfigure anyone who set foot in it.

This explained why Lucifer was so hell-bent on revenge when he was freed. He had been left to rot and suffer in this tiny box all alone over a single act of defiance. It made Sam's heart ache, and it made Sam despise God in Lucifer's stead. To think even Michael, the son who sought only to obey God's every wish, had been betrayed by his father. Adam, more of a casualty than anything else, was left to wither away here as well.

The realization only made Sam's heart sink deeper. Even after the pain he had endured, and despite all the lives he had saved, Sam felt like he had only cleaned the planet of individuals God simply didn't like.

In his own little corner, Sam cried.

As he cried, he remembered something Lucifer had said. The words felt so long ago.

"...My heart breaks for you. The weight on your shoulders, what you've done, what you still have to do. It is more than anyone could bear. If there was some other way...but there isn't. I will never lie to you and I will never trick you...."

"...I think I know you better than you know yourself...."

 


	2. Judecca

Sam was half-way through reliving parts of his torture in his head when something slammed the cage's walls violently. For a split second, Sam thought God had come to rescue the four of them but no, Sam would be luckier to find a bearded man named Santa surrounded by friendly elves up in the North than to hear an apology from God.

What Sam did find when he opened his tired eyes was the sight of Lucifer _and_ Michael trying to punch their way out of the cage. Sam didn't expect the brothers to be working together, let alone planning a means to break out of this seemingly impenetrable cage.

However, Sam could see a tiny crack forming after Lucifer and Michael attacked the wall a third (or maybe fourth) time. It was a miracle, but Sam was half-worried about what they would find just outside. All he could see through the stone walls, through the tiny gaps in between, was the occasional flashes of lightning. It was terribly cold outside too.

Sam didn't think he would prefer the security of these walls to the potential nothingness outside. Dean's stories of Hell didn't help ease his concerns.

Lucifer and Michael stared at the small crack before whispering something to each other. Adam sat wide-eyed behind them, filled with fear and probably over the same reason as Sam. When Michael's silvery eyes turned towards him, Sam nearly jumped out of his skin, but the words that reached him were loud and clear.

"Sam, go sit with Adam. We are going to break this wall down temporarily and we will fly you out. Be ready."

The idea that they were actually going to leave didn't excite Sam as much as it should, because Sam still had too many questions and too many doubts in his head to feel happy. He crawled over towards Adam anyway (what choice did he have?), and hugged the boy back when fingers clutched his shirt in an attempt to feel grounded and less afraid.

Just then, the two archangels glowed as if set aflame by light. Sam and Adam had to shield their eyes, and while they did, a loud bang resonated throughout the cage and rang in Sam's ears. Almost as soon as Sam heard the explosive noise, he felt a pair of arms yank him away from Adam. He wanted to reach out and retrieve his younger brother, who cried out his name in fear. The feeling of ice hit Sam's skin a moment later, and when Sam realized his legs were dangling in mid-air, he understood that he was being carried off by an archangel.

His fear dwindled, but he refused to open his eyes. He didn't want to know what Hell looked like.

Sam was freezing though, and could barely withstand the cold. Whoever was carrying him had him held by the arm pits, and a part of Sam wanted to be held more closer to the unidentified archangel. Most of all, Sam wanted to be out of this area before he became a block of ice. As he continued to ascend, he felt his skin warm slightly, but then whoever was carrying him began to slow down, and he heard a voice -- Michael's voice? -- call to the other archangel, asking to land.

They did, and Sam's feet nearly slipped when it touched solid ice. He landed on his knees when the archangel let him go, and Sam looked over his shoulder to confirm that it was indeed Michael who had been carrying him. A part of him wished it was Lucifer, though he somewhat regretted the desire when Adam was dropped face first onto the ice by an irritated looking Lucifer.

"Tired, now? Seriously?" Lucifer spoke with disbelief. "We're still in the Ninth Circle, Michael!"

Sam looked around, and found the four of them on a platform of ice. Tall blocks of ice stood before him, all around him, in a gigantic circle. Sam and Adam had been dropped onto what was practically a ledge, flat ice that reflected perfectly but felt nearly too cold to touch.

At the center of this large area was a giant hole, lined with still water Sam did not remember passing through. Was that the reason he felt warmer? Was the cage literally floating in ice-cold water? No one appeared wet, but Michael looked exhausted, the strain of escaping seemed to have affected him the most. Adam, who was lying on the ground, also looked weak, the fear of being here must be taxing.

As Lucifer and Michael began bickering, Sam observed the ice blocks surrounding him. There were many, rows of four all around judging by the cylinder tubes sticking through the top of each block and connecting to the next layer above. The ceiling appeared to be another platform with a hole in the center, all made of ice. Sam shivered and watched his own breath pass visibly through his lips. The place would have appeared stunning if not for how terrified it made Sam feel. He did not wish to stay trapped here.

The area however, reminded Sam of an Italian poet -- Dante -- who had written detailed descriptions of Hell's appearance. Sam never had the chance to read any of his works, and it might have helped prepare Sam for what to expect. Even if Dante was just a poet, Sam knew the lore books alone couldn't be trusted given the lack of mention of ice or Lucifer's prison, or the fact that said prison looked like a box submerged in water.

Regardless of what Sam knew, Sam never doubted that Hell was a horrible place to be. He only needed to know what kinds of people were likely to end up in Hell to be sure of that.

Talking about people, Sam noticed a strange, blurry figure in one of the square blocks. Sam approached, his curiosity besting his fears. It took six steps for Sam to realize that he was looking at a man encased in ice. Sam stumbled back with a tiny gasp. He could just about make out the man's features; young, with a dark beard and seemingly alive and trapped, and most surprising of all, he looked to be staring directly at Sam, observing the hunter with unblinking eyes. It was unnerving, the thought alone made Sam shiver.

In spite of his discomfort, Sam walked closer to the man, almost close enough to touch. He was partially aware of other blurry figures inside other boxes. They were probably watching him too, and...

"SAM!"

Lucifer bellowed, and Sam spun round in shock. Adam was still lying sideways on the ground, but he was now eyeing Sam, and possibly the man behind him, in horror. Michael was watching him with tired eyes, while Lucifer looked as if he was ready to skin Sam alive, just like he did when the torturing first began. The glare made Sam want to take a step back.

Sam couldn't move however, as Lucifer had opt to pull him forward using telekinesis. Lucifer glared angrily at the hunter as he drew Sam closer, Sam's feet nearly hovering over the smooth surface as he did. When Sam felt he was going to be tortured again for sure, the rage in Lucifer's eyes dissipated. He appeared unwilling to hurt Sam again. Sam was released within arm's reach, and Lucifer turned away.

It didn't please Sam, for the guilt that had been building up while they were in the cage made Sam feel responsible for the dejected look on the archangel's face. He never intended to hurt Lucifer this much.

Before he could utter a word, Adam rose to his knees and spoke.

"Who's that man?"

All four turned to the direction of the man still motionless inside one of the many ice blocks. From this distance, Sam couldn't tell if the man's eyes were still on him, or simply fixed in a way that made Sam think so. It was a sad, probably agonizing way for someone to exist, and Sam felt a little sick knowing this was the fate of some sinners.

"Judas Iscariot, a man who had betrayed God's chosen and was sentenced to remain locked up in a prison void of warmth and freedom," Michael explained.

Sam's breath hitched. Of course, it explained why Sam recognized the outfit. He had seen variations of The Last Supper countless times and all diners wore the same style garment. This meant that Jesus was a real person, truly chosen by God and not some mere mortal. In addition, Sam had very nearly come into physical contact with this traitorous man. The knowledge made Sam feel even more nauseated. He didn't want to do anything like that again.

Though to think that this was the kind of punishment God delivered to those who betrayed his chosen ones, God was by all means an unforgiving entity. There were more prisoners, each filling only a quarter of the blocks that Sam could see. Sam felt a little afraid, but not in the kind of way that would lead to worship in exchange for God's pardon. Sam didn't want one, not when he felt like he didn't deserved it. His sympathy for Lucifer might have already placed him on the list of God's unwanted anyhow, and Sam didn't care.

He understood Lucifer, which was the inevitable truth.

Sam was then reminded that if he did escape Hell, he was going to do it with Michael and Lucifer in tow. His eyes darted to the center of the platform, and that same righteous part of him that had convinced him to come here wanted him to push Lucifer into the lake. He couldn't risk the lives of so many people again. He didn't want the blood of millions on his hands. He might as well swim back down to the cage himself if it meant Michael and Lucifer were kept away from innocent lives.

He wasn't a saint, it wasn't his duty to save the world, but Sam was prone to seek out righteous acts unless he went mad with guilt. Then again, Sam didn't want anyone - even Lucifer - to go back down there, to sit inside the walls of the now, broken prison. He wasn't a saint, but Sam had a hard time living with the thought that he made a single angel upset, and even with millions of lives at stake, Sam doubted he would force Lucifer to stay here any longer.

The righteous voice was still loud though, beckoning Sam to reconsider as Sam turned his back on the others and inched closer to the center. He ignored the sound of Adam yelling, _broken_ and _free_ , and eyed the water with a growing desire not to risk the people on the planet.

For a moment, Sam felt like he was truly going to choose humanity all over again, to throw himself back into the heart of Hell for people he didn't even know and for people he loved, and ignore the angel's pain, but by the next moment, Michael was carrying him up into the next layer. The move made Sam feel horrible enough to throw up, but he reigned in the self-directed disgust as best as he could.

There was no point in looking weak and pathetic, even if he felt like he had lost the chance to save mankind.

Maybe God would keep him here when he died.

Once they had passed through the center of the next platform, Sam's conflicted thoughts were disrupted by a distraction that came in the form of hundreds of people bound neck-deep in the icy-floor. This sight was accompanied by Adam's horrified screaming.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I'd appreciate any help in pointing out grammar errors or inconsistencies. Multi-chapters aren't my strong suit. Anyway, I hope you readers enjoy~


End file.
